009: Why You Haven’t Left Yet

Are you a doctor feeling trapped in your current career routine, dreaming of remote work, more flexibility, or living abroad—but not sure how to move forward? In this episode, Dr. Kristine shares her personal journey and insights into why many physicians stay stuck and the practical steps to break free.

Key topics:

• Why physicians stay in their current jobs despite wanting change
• The importance of creating mental space for strategic thinking
• How passive research delays action and what to do instead
• The role of discomfort in growth and how to embrace it
• Getting out of decision paralysis
• The power of making a concrete decision with a deadline
• Reframing worst-case scenarios to reduce fear of change
• Practical tips to transition from planning to action
• How a one-way plane ticket can be the catalyst for change

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

You're listening to Doctors Abroad, the podcast for doctors who want to build remote income and create location independence. I'm Dr. Christine Golman, founder of Nomadem Day. I've exceeded my hospital income while working part-time and living abroad. And on this show, we break down how to make hospital income optional. Let's get started. I want to talk about something that I don't think we talk about enough as physicians. And it's not whether the change that we want in our careers is possible. It's not even what we could be doing instead. I want to talk about why so many of us stay stuck for so long, even when we know we don't want to keep working the way that we're working. Because at this point, a lot of doctors I talk to, they've already thought about doing something different. They've considered it, they've looked into it, maybe they've even joined a group or started researching what else is out there. And still, they haven't taken action towards building remote income on their terms. And I want to talk about why. Back in the US, back in my normal routine, back working the way I was working, 60 plus hours a week, documentation on the weekends. And I knew from that point, I cannot live like this. I cannot be someone who is okay with being on call, working six days a week, sometimes seven if I'm including right in my notes, taking a vacation every few months, being off four to six weeks a year, living in one country. That was never going to be enough for me. I did not want a life that was centered around work. I wanted more than that. I didn't leave the country until 2021. So the real question is: what happened in between? Because that's where most people are living. In between where they are feeling underpaid and overworked and don't have the flexibility that they want. And the life where they really have a say in their time, in their schedule, where they get to say goodbye to their current way of working and living, whether that is making more money and less time, working remotely, living abroad, or all of the above. So I'm going to talk about the five things that kept me stuck during that 2019 to 2021 period. Why? Because these are likely the things keeping you stuck. So here we go. Point number one, you don't have the space to think. In the beginning, I couldn't even consider how I was going to leave my job and move abroad. This was my first job out of training, the only real job I ever had. And it wasn't that I didn't think I was smart enough to do it. It wasn't that I didn't want it enough. But the truth is, I was just exhausted. I was tired. I was working every day, trying to get through the week, seeing patients, teaching, charting, meetings, trying to take care of myself. I was going to Pilates, I was going to yoga, I was going to swim lessons, I was trying to see my family on the weekends. There was no space. And this is where a lot of doctors get stuck first. You're thinking about it, but you never give yourself the time to actually sit down and figure it out. You don't get unstuck while you're overwhelmed. You get unstuck when you have dedicated time and space to think. Now, what that looked like for me was getting my first coach in February 2020. And she wasn't a career coach or focused on moving abroad. Actually, this coach told me point blank that what I wanted to do wasn't even possible. And that it would take me at least three to four years before I could even consider moving abroad as a doctor and working remotely. But that wasn't even the point. She gave me something that was imperative. Something that I didn't even know was crucial to me changing my work and my life forever. She gave me dedicated time and space to think about what was next. Structured time every week to think about my life. Time that was not about just making it through the day, finishing my work, checking my inbox. Time where the only question was, how am I gonna get out of this? And once I had that time, I started to figure things out. Not all at once, but piece by piece, money, retirement, student loans, licensing, where I was gonna live, all of it. Not because I had suddenly become a different person that had all the time in the world to figure it out. No. But because I gave myself one hour a week to think. Point number two. Research is keeping you stuck. Okay, the next thing that really cut me stuck, and I see this all the time, is staying in research mode. We love research, we love learning, we love gathering information. We will go on YouTube, Instagram, TikTok, we'll go on it all. And it feels so productive, but at a point it is not because gathering information is a passive experience. Why are you doing this excessive research? I had to ask myself that. And it's because it feels good, because it's comfortable. You get to live in the psychological fantasy of the next version of your life without taking any action. It is a risk-free environment. But you will know when you are actually taking action towards the career and the life you want because it will not feel comfortable. Actually, it will feel very uncomfortable, which brings up point three. You are waiting to feel ready and comfortable for the next step. You are not going to feel comfortable doing this. You were just not. And I wasn't either, right? Sending emails to the clients and companies that align with the type of work that you want to do, having conversations with potential referral partners, telling people about what you do and who you are and how you can help them, setting boundaries with your current work, putting yourself out there. The actions needed to replace your income remotely, they can be very, very simple, especially with the support that we give of crafting your pitches and providing email templates of exactly what you need to say to land your contract. That doesn't mean that taking those actions are going to feel easy or good. At least not in the beginning, not initially. And that's how you know you're doing the things that actually move you forward. You feel that discomfort, that ball in the pit of your stomach, and you're like, ooh, yeah, this is change. We were not trained to think independently. We were not trained to step outside the system. So of course it feels uncomfortable. But that is the price. Discomfort is the price for freedom, for flexibility, for an uncapped income. To tell the truth, you're already uncomfortable now. But you're used to this version of discomfort. There was nothing comfortable about getting paged in the middle of the night. Nothing comfortable about breaking my sleep. But this is the version of discomfort that you've seen and heard and known intimately since training. The next level of your career and freedom will take a different version of discomfort. But feeling it doesn't mean that you're not ready. Actually being willing to feel that discomfort means that you are. And that takes us to point four. You're trying to make it perfect. Now you can ask anyone who really knows me, my family, my Dr. Bestie, if there was someone who was going to try to make things perfect, it is me. Okay. It's me. I literally had a list of things that I thought I needed to figure out before I left the US. And I'm going to tell you the truth. I'm going to be so transparent on here. Some of the things on that list, I still haven't figured out today. Literally. And I have been living abroad, working remotely as a physician for five years, which means not everything on that list mattered. You need to know the essentials, money, how you're going to make your income, legal basics. All the other things, the logistics, they are so doable. And you will figure them out one by one along the way. And that's also the great part about working with someone who's been there and done that already. You don't have to figure it out alone, and you can fast track your way through all of the potential mistakes and all of those logistics. If I book it, I'm going. So when people tell me, Dr. Christine, I'm going to quit my job, I ask when? Because if there's no date, it is not happening. When you have made a decision, you have a date and a time connected to it. It is no longer a fantasy, it is a fact. It is on your schedule. And making a decision is what catapults you from that in-between stage where you're gathering more information to that definitive stage where you start implementing what you now know. And last and bonus point, the worst case scenario isn't that bad. One of the biggest fears that I had was what if this doesn't work? And I remember I was talking to an insurance broker because I was purchasing an international healthcare policy as I was planning to be a digital nomad. And I remember going back and forth with him, overthinking everything, like, should I do this one? Should I do that one? And finally he got so exasperated with me. He asked me point blank, what is the worst thing that could happen? And I thought about it and said, I move abroad and it doesn't work. What if I end up sick out there and I have to come back? And he was like, Okay, then you come back. And I was like, Oh, hmm. He was like, Yeah, you moving back into the country would automatically be a qualifying life event. You would get insurance again, you would get another job or go back to the same job. And it hit me in that moment. Oh my gosh. The worst case scenario is I end up doing the thing that I'm doing right now. And I already know how to do that, right? So what am I actually afraid of? And it was change. I was just afraid of change. And that simply is all I had to realize. So if you are feeling stuck right now, it's probably not because you don't know enough. It's because you haven't given yourself time to think. You're staying in research mode, you are waiting to feel ready and comfortable, you are trying to make it perfect, or you haven't decided. And underneath all of that, it's fear, which is normal. But fear doesn't mean stop. It just means you are doing something different. And if you want help moving from planning and research mode to execution so that you can stop feeling stuck and actually create the time, location, and financial independence that you've been wanting for years, you can book a one-to-one freedom consultation at theNomadMD.com. Thanks for listening to Doctors Abroad. If this episode was helpful, share it with a colleague who's been thinking about building more freedom and flexibility in medicine. And if you're ready to make hospital income optional, book a one to one freedom consultation at thenomadmd.com. I'll see you in the next episode.